Wow! It’s crazy to believe it’s been three whole years since I’ve written anything on here. They say time heals but I can confirm it still all hurts. I do feel as though it isn’t as ‘raw’ anymore and we can reflect without as many tears. I definitely feel ready to continue sharing my experiences after the loss of our boy so I’ll pick up from where this blog paused a few years ago…
Following Lenny’s funeral, my family stayed on with valuable time being spent together. We celebrated my brother’s birthday a few days early & treated him to a massive chocolate cake at Kinross Winery where I had worked up until Lennys birth. I’ll never forget celebrating the Guy Fawkes’ fireworks at Wilcox Green across the road from our little Arrowtown house & Dads reaction waking up surrounded by snow at the start of November before flying back to the hot Aussie summer awaiting them.
My amazing midwife Jess had organised Maternity leave for me which in New Zealand at the time was 18 weeks. I filled my days with lots of furniture up-cycling and walks with George, my furry friend. I’ll forever be grateful that George was by my side as he truly is my little best friend and rode the emotional rollercoaster with us. I found myself getting a little lonely at home and felt the need to step outside of my comfort zone so I had agreed to ‘tidy up’ a ladies backyard and garden.
She was 38 weeks pregnant with her baby and urgently needed help with her yard. She asked me a few questions and I told her I had a baby boy 7 weeks ago who was born sleeping. Her face dropped and she told me she felt bad having me do her yard work but I insisted I felt 100% physically healthy and am just so happy to be out of the house. She left me with some cash and I immediately got stuck into all of her yard work. While doing the lawns edges my edge trimmer’s line cut one of her hedge plants back to ground level. I panicked and tried to stick it back together which made it look even worse. I FaceTimed my husband for advice on what to do and sent him a picture of what I’d done with his reaction being “What the bloody hell were you thinking?!?”. I could see he was trying so hard not to laugh, which is when I hung up on him and dashed into town to buy another plant I thought was similar and planted it as fast as I could. I’ve never felt more humiliated and went straight home.
I still laugh about this experience to this day…
